Max’s Birthday

Today is Max’s first birthday!
I wanted to get a tattoo of Max’s handprint in his honor. But the tattoo guy said Max’s handsize is too small to tattoo properly! It’s about 1 inch by 1 inch and the Toronto tattoo guy said he’d have to enlarge it to make it work.

handprint

So we said, nah that’s okay, because it’s the size that matters for our Maxy boy. I didn’t want to choose something on the fly that’s crappy and not cool like Max.
So we have spent some time looking at his pictures and watching his videos and thinking of him.
We watched his nice slideshow which is a good encapsulation of his life.

We really miss our little baby a lot. It’s been tough. Tougher than most people probably even think. It makes it harder that he was such a cool dude when he was around, so you miss him a lot more when he’s gone and wonder what he’d be up to by now. But I’m glad we got to spend the time with him that we did.

We love you, Max.
Also special thanks to everyone else who showed their love for our Max, Team Max. That was very nice.

Longing

I sure do miss my Max.
He is without a doubt the strongest dude I’ve ever come across.
I remember the NICU nurses calling him a “rock star”.
Made daddy very proud.

Maxy boy, daddy loves you the best forever and ever and then even longer.

Right Now

I look at my pictures of Max everyday and kiss them. Once in the morning, and then once in the afternoon while at work. I keep the same roll of pictures on my phone, but I don’t have all of them.

It’s like, there are certain folders of his pictures I look at more sparingly, so that way I can check them out when I miss him the most and it’s almost like new pictures because I don’t remember them as well as the ones I see everyday.

Even though I definitely looked through every scrap of him for his funeral slideshow etc, sometimes the pictures can still feel like new. Like I barely remember the below but I adore it.

Temperature Time

At least it wasn’t the old fashioned way…

And don’t even get me started on the videos. Seeing his little chest move up and down. Wow.

It’s damn tough and it doesn’t stop.

Max Is Turning Japanese

I was extremely pleasantly surprised to check my e-mail this morning and see that my old friend Katie has shown her support for Team Max all the way from Japan.

She sent along the following pictures.

Somewhere in Japan

Somewhere in Japan

Asakusa Temple

Asakusa Temple

She made the sweet sign and went to the temple in Asakusa, Tokyo, Japan.

Lots of people go around New Year’s to celebrate the past year and the upcoming year, and when you walk in you become all spiritually clean and whatnot. My friend even lit a candle for Maxy-Boy! So he has something to talk about with all the Buddhist Baby Angels.

I’m also glad to report that this is the 5th continent with representation on Team Max, with just Africa and Antarctica lagging behind.

Merry Christmax

Christmas time can be very hard and stressful. It’s especially difficult because we all miss our angel baby Max so much, and wish he was here with us to hug, and kiss, and shower with presents.

But, the next best thing we can do to honor our monkey boy is decorate his house for the season.

Keri did an awesome job adding stuff for Maxy boy so he has the best stone of all:

 

Then, in typcal Grandma fashion, my mom showed up bringing loads more presents:

Maxy boy is going to get spoiled. Also, he’s being featured in ornaments:

 

A real life Angel for the tree!

Merry Christmas, Max.

P.S. – He also comes in cuddly blanket form.

Six Month Birthday

I just wanted to mark today because it’s the 6-month birthday of our little Maxy angel boy. Six months ago he was presented to me all wrapped up and beautiful with those pouty lips.  I miss him so much and kiss his pictures multiple times a day, and think about him watching me when I see a cloud or a star. Love forever and ever.

When they first presented him to me.

Like A Rolling Stone

Max finally got his high-powered, super-cool, extra unique tombstone it. If I didn’t love him so much, I’d steal it and hang it in my own room.

Feel The Power

Smooth

 

Instagrammed

I think it turned out wonderfully. I’m not in the business of offending Max’s friends in BabyLand, but he’s definitely rocking the greatest marking. I went out there Friday, and just laid on it, and cried, and cried, and my remember my baby and how much I miss him and hope he can see me.  I laid right where he’s buried and there’s a pretty nice view.

He gets lots of cool babies around him, and there’s a nice sky and a tree:

Max’s Trees

I think Max would sign off on this deal.

Or maybe his official signature can now be:

Pretty classy.

Sidenote: Apparently today is Pregnancy and Infancy Lost Remember Day.
Obviously, it’s something we remember everyday and will forever, but a lot of other family similar consequences, with miscarriages, or stillbirths, or just infant death.

I’m forever grateful for my 16 days with Max. I’m still drawing favorite memories for, he’s my hero.  And that’s why I still want to keep his story up to date. helluva kid who touched a lot of people hearts. Support others know who have gone through something similar , and realize there’s really not much worse a person could go through.

Just FYI and you live near the Houston Area, Max hangs out in Babyland at Memorial Oaks Funeral Home and cemetery. You can tell him because he has a Polish and American flag. He would like grave decorations like animals or dragons or giraffes, but stuff that can stand the weather.I felt so good after laying with him, maybe others can too.

Happy Birthday: New Artifacts

Firstly, Happy 4 month birthday to my baby boy. Best day of my life, honestly. I don’t know what I was running on, adrenaline or what, but it was amazing. Anyway, as time goes by, we’re making a concerted effort to collect every skim of memory of Max, be it on someone’s cell phone, camera, their mind?

So here is some stuff that I hadn’t even seen. It brings me back to the best times of my life. It’s a steady downhill since. Just NO MEANING without here with us. He was our perfection. The shining light. And he always will be. So here are some new pictures salvaged from family’s phones etc.:

 

I’m a maniac!

Lift!

This bath sucks.

Hey, how’s it going?

So, you’re a nurse, huh?

It’s sleepy in here.

Baggy diapers are the latest fashion.

Also, we got a couple of all new never before released videos!

Max Kicking Some Ass! (and my hand)

Sorry, Maxy Boy. The above bath one might be embarrassing, but I hate baths too!

Happy birthday crazy monkey boy!